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I Might As Well Live Blog This

Because Plurk/Twitter ran out of room! I’m sharing my thoughts on the Big Spendy Super Bowl Commercials b/c I got tired of keeping my character count low.

Final Final Update:

My apologies to Betty White. I started late and skipped the Snickers spot. Please don’t come and kick my ass. I saw you roast William Shatner and what you lack in football skills, you more than make up for with an acerbic tongue.

If you want to watch all the spots, here they are at AdAge.com.

Final Update,9:00 pm

Congrats New Orleans. Great, great defense, despite me wondering aloud to the dogs, repeatedly, “why so much tiiiime for Manning?” I’m sure the Chiefs will get there next year. (try not to snort all over your screen, k?)

Egads, yet another eTrade spot. Maaaake theeeeeem stopppppp.

Final flo.tv spot – funny, made the point, but it also made me think – really? Do we need to have television :everywhere: all the time? Heaven forbid you talk to you kids in the car, just keep ’em hypnotized.

Update: 8:48 pm

WOW. N’awlens is gonna win this, I do believe!

Danica Patrick: you need to find some sort of better gig. Have a little pride in your accomplishments, not your accoutrements.

Denny’s Chickens? Now only require :10 to make me laugh. I reverse my earlier declaration that the campaign was off.

Update: 8:42 pm CST

OK. Ninja Dorito Tim made me laugh out loud. Nice touch with the chip-to-the-neck.

Bud Light Book Club – huh. A bit funny, made the guy look like a total cheesehead. (Hey, I’ll be fair!)

Oh yay, more weird eTrade babies. I didn’t even understand that one.

Yay, the Amazing Race starts next week!

Update: 8:37 pm CST

And Tracey Porter will live THAT moment for the rest. of. his. life.

Audi’s Green Diesel car – nice spot. I’m the recycling nutjob in our house so it resonated.

Taco Bell – kinda lame. Star power be damned, Charles Barkley. Yes, I said it. Please don’t show up on my doorstep.

Update: 8:30 pm CST

I have to say, this has turned into quite good football game.

Dante’s Inferno only reminds me of LEEEEEEROOOOOY Jenkins.

Budweiser colt/calf? Gotta have the animal spot.

Honda – interesting I suppose – got the nooks & crannies and a fit for everything message across.

Denny’s follow-up spot – now, this is good. Especially on the heels of Leroy Jenkins, who at least has chicken. The screaming chickens, fleeing respective cities, and the Oval Office scene should make this one of the top-rated spots tomorrow.

Update 8:10 pm CST

Vizio’s new tv? with video apps? WAAAAANT. Pretty cool spot and loads of tiny details for the web-devoted.:cough:

Emerald Nuts & Pop Secret: funny. Odd combo. A bit confusing at first, but I’ve seen enough EN commercials to know they always deliver- gotta love the people-as-dolphins, and kudos for including a dude.

Update 8:08 pm CST

Did you know that in this huge chunk of tv time we call the Super Bowl there’s really only about 11 minutes of actual football PLAYING TIME? There’s just a lot of standing around and getting ready, but not so much action. (article in Wall Street Journal a couple weeks ago.)

NFL: Nice spot, using Arcade Fire automatically makes me feel connected. Except it got used a LOT for the movie “Where the Wild Things Are” and I went to put that in our Netflix queue.

Second time Air Force ran their spot – it’s good. Obviously aimed at chilluns who can read that shit faster than me, on the bottoms of their surfboards and boogieboards.

Time Warner Cable: Wife is swooping in and making you scrapbook if you have Direct TV. Fuck. My. Life.

Quick Trip (local spot) – funny.

Update: 8:03 pm CST

Kia Sorento? Loved it. Sock Monkey is a scamp. Entertaining. The tattoo scene was the best.

Roundup: What are you doing in here? It’s February. We have snow everywhere, not weeds. I hope you didn’t pay a lot.

Budweiser 55: Huh. Eventually beer will be devoid of all flavor, calories and color. It will be called “water”.

Update: 7:59 pm CST

Census: Yay, look at my favorite actors from Waiting for Guffman, etc.

Google! You pretty much rule the school and own the world. Spot gave me goosebumps. Googlebumps?

Update: 7:52 pm CST

Michelob Ultra with Lance Armstrong? Huh. Surprise. Memorable, if only for the surprise factor. Whodathunk he’d spokesperson for beer?

HomeAway.com – good takeaway, disarming to see the stars from movies I saw in my formative years looking like my grandparents.

Bridgestone – whew, I thought we’d have a mysogyny-free 3rd quarter, but good! Way to keep it revived. Message?  We’d rather keep the tires than our wife.

Coke! I love your ads, sorry I forgot to give you props for the earlier awesome Simpsons ad, and this safari trek was nifty.

eTrade, thanks for bringing up the rear there with another bitchy woman-in-form-of-toddler ad. Thanks! Because you weren’t creepy enough.

Update: 7:43 pm CST

Miller HighLife – made me chuckle, but not compelling enough to go to the website.

Football: Hank Baskett is gonna re-live that moment for a long, long time. Woof.

PunchBUG! I love it. Nice touch with Stevie Wonder at the end.

Denny’s chickens? Kinda freaky. I kept expecting some sort of fried-chicken dish, much as I oppose putting live animals in juxtaposition with cooked product, so was relieved it was eggs. (good thing no pigs had cameos, given the side of bacon…)  I couldn’t tell you what the timeframe is for the giveaway, but I’m sure it will be just as successful as last year’s.

Halftime Show:

I’m not kidding. It’s like one giant run-on ad for the three CBS CSI properties. Coincidence? I think not. Someone had to dust Roger Daltrey off and wake him up.

Update: 7:12 pm CST

So, I’m back. And I’m wondering if CBS, the NFL and the Super Bowl realize that women watch this game, too. (About a third of the audience is female)

The Dodge Charger ad? Meh, fine, all you guys are put-upon and we nag the shit out of you and you agree to do it because, in the end, you get a speedy car. Just to be a bitch (and as someone who knows more about car models than a lot of guys), that rear window is a real challenge to see much of anything, so if it comes with a rear camera option, take it. I found myself going nuts trying to place the voice. (Dexter’s Michael C. Hall, if you were also wondering.)

But THEN, flo.tv? I hate you. Women remove their men’s spines and make them go underwear shopping. Huh. Does this actually happen in the real world?

Teleflora – women are backbiting bitches in the workplace, too. Sweet. I guess the beyotch getting evil flowers in a box from someone in prison was ‘justice’ but still. I kept hearing the arrows whizzing past me at the male target.

Intel – poor man’s Paul Giamatti. Sorta flat. Nice touch at the end though, putting people behind the trademark notes and electronics/brand.

Second flo.tv with the will.i.am re-mix was much better, but it’s too late, I already hate you.

All the Budweiser ads have been meh to me as well. The human bridge was kinda freaky, the Lost spoof was amusing but predictable.

Oh, and Danica Patrick? Please. Someday GoDaddy will just…GO. Away.

6:33 pm

Ads so far: LOVED the Letterman Show spot, with Oprah and Jay. Like, mind-blowing for a dedicated Dave fan. Awesome.

I liked the Dove for Men ad. I would buy it for the Wo.

Let me take a minute to school our friends at the Dockers home office. If you are going to run an ad (a rather weird ad, but it had a great lead-in with CareerBuilder’s startling workplace with underwear-wearing employees) that states “Free Pants” DURING THE SUPER BOWL, you are going to need a bigger server. I immediately typed in the dedicated URL and waited. And waited. After several minutes, it loaded. I clicked on “Men” and the whole fuckin’ thing crashed. Yep, it was me. Guess what – people watch TV and they multi-task. I guess if you wanted hits as your measurement of success – yay! You got it! But how annoying to not have the party ready when we all showed up.

The Doritos ads are… meh – though the shock collar one did make me chuckle. Right now I have two dogs begging to be fed, so I’m going to pause & be back shortly.

3 Comments

  1. Oh my gosh. This was a fabulous post! THANKS for sharing! I laughed and now I can’t wait to see the ones that hit prime time. Or at least the good ones.

  2. betty was awesome. the simpsons coke ad was fabulous. doritos and danica needed to go away. the peanuts and the pop corn was great!

    could’ve lived without doritos and godaddy ones…

  3. Charles Barkley scares me. Plz don’t “rap” anymore. KThxBai!
    The Dorito-ninja ad cracked me up. Somehow I see Mark, with his dorito love. He also knew the Dante’s Inferno game before it was 2 seconds in…
    We only watched the second half – and the majority of the ads were quite misogynistic. Sad.

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