Fortunately, we live in modern times, so when we get sick with chest colds and sore throats and sniffly noses, we have a whole host of products at our fingertips we can buy to make ourselves feel better. It would be better to not have the symptoms in the first place, which is more a veiled reference to Kristin and her current symptoms, however, there are some things, like colds, which you can’t avoid. I liked how, for weeks preceding my own cold, people talked about how they were “fightin’ off a cold”. How does one fight off a virus? Chicken soup? I hear Oprah uses some herbal remedy. I use Zicam but sometimes, there’s just no stopping The Cold, because The Cold can be like a dysfunctional family member who simply doesn’t listen to the word “no”. So I pretty much succumb. I felt Cold coming into the House of Jen on Sunday, and by Tuesday it had unpacked its bags, eaten three bags of Doritos, and done a load of laundry. There were no bitchslaps or sucker punches to throw. The Cold was here. I’ve put it on notice, and by staying home from work today, am supervising the Cold and making sure it folds its laundry and puts some of it back into its suitcase. Because it will be leaving, and taking its chest maracas and runny nose with it. There is no need to fight, this is not a burgeoning Bronchitis Party, I will not sacrifice myself for the Cold or Work or anything else. This is the line drawn in the Kleenex, Mister, and by Friday, I will be symptom-free.