{"id":1041,"date":"2007-04-18T13:48:00","date_gmt":"2007-04-18T18:48:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lawrencem94.sg-host.com\/?p=1041"},"modified":"2007-04-18T13:48:00","modified_gmt":"2007-04-18T18:48:00","slug":"mouth-breathers-unite","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/?p=1041","title":{"rendered":"Mouth Breathers, Unite!"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I seem to be on a strange evolution involving my sinuses. It would be nice if the end goal were that I will grow scent pockets in them, akin to the bloodhounds, and be able to track things across water. Not that I have a great need for tracking in general, but it would be a nifty SuperSkill to have, I think. Can you tell I was influenced by this show on hound dogs over the weekend?<\/p>\n<p>So the trouble all started last January, and while I&#8217;ve kiiiind of stopped coughing at night &#8211; I did actually stop completely, but I have a bit of recurrence going on this week &#8211; I feel like my nose and sinuses have been packed with expand-o foam that would ordinarily be used to ship something fragile via your friendly box-kicking carrier.  And my voice is rapidly dropping into the dulcet tones of Kathleen Turner, and I&#8217;m afraid I&#8217;m going to skip right past the tenor section to the froggy croaking section of the Oakridge Boys.<\/p>\n<p>And I&#8217;m mouth-breathing. Damn, it is so sexy. I imagine what my co-workers think as they pass by on their way to the supply closet (yes, my half-office-half-cube is almost a Harry Potter residence), and they HAVE to be thinking, GODDAMN! That woman is staring at her computer with her jaw gaping open, gaspin&#8217; like a sexxy fish. She is soooooooo fine.<\/p>\n<p>Wait&#8217;ll I start singing. Giddyup! A boom boppa mouw mouw&#8230;&#8230;&#8230;.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I seem to be on a strange evolution involving my sinuses. It would be nice if the end goal were that I will grow scent pockets in them, akin to the bloodhounds, and be able to track things across water. Not that I have a great need for tracking in general, but it would be [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_mi_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[16],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1041"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1041"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1041\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1041"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1041"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1041"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}