{"id":1048,"date":"2007-04-27T12:28:00","date_gmt":"2007-04-27T17:28:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lawrencem94.sg-host.com\/?p=1048"},"modified":"2007-04-27T12:28:00","modified_gmt":"2007-04-27T17:28:00","slug":"liquor-n-plants","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/?p=1048","title":{"rendered":"Liquor -N- Plants"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I started out my morning by, well, getting up. That&#8217;s always a good way to start, as opposed to waking up dead, or say, just falling out of bed and crawling around on the floor.  AFTER that part, I went to Sutherlands, because they had annuals for $0.69 a four-pack. And hostas in 1# pots for $1.99. Dudes and dudettes, that is Super Cheap! (Oh, maybe I should point out real quicklike that I took today off. I&#8217;m going to surprise the Wo with my industrious mad gardenin&#8217; skeelz! Hopefully.) So I got a bunch of cheap petunias and three hostas and it was like, $15, and it almost offset the fact that I truly despise shopping at Sutherlands! Talk about a place in need of a makeover. <\/p>\n<p>Then it was on to the KC Gardener&#8217;s Society annual plant sale. Where I was accosted by every single person working the sale, and I brought the median age down by a good thirty years. It was like fresh blood in the water, and everyone wanted to help me. I ended up buying :cough: a lot of plants. It was sort of the reverse of what I once read about child pickpockets in Other Countries, how they swarm you and distract you and they practice in a warehouse under the tutelage of a Master Evil Pickpocket with a long stick pointing out techniques on a mannequin rigged with bells. So when I say the reverse of that, I mean: Old people piling me up with plants. &#8220;Have you heard about Pineapple Sage?&#8221;  (Ah, yes!) &#8220;Did you see we marked the begonias down from $5 to $3.50?&#8221; (Um, yes, I was standing next to you when you told her to do it?) And an ongoing list of inquisitive questions about what other plants I wanted, and did I have a list, and what sort of clematis did I have back at my house, and always with each new pot going into my cardboard flat, &#8220;You are sure gonna be busy this weekend!&#8221; in an excited, chirpy, &#8220;we got another one, Vern, and if she buys three more plants we get upgraded to VIP at the Waid&#8217;s cafeteria!&#8221; sort of way. The priceless moment for me was, at the end of ringing all these plants up, the Head Lady asked me if I was a member, and I said, &#8220;My husband is,&#8221; and she asked his name, and I told her, and WITHOUT LOOKING she sternly said, &#8220;HE hasn&#8217;t paid his dues!&#8221; It was like meeting the Wizard of Gomer&#8217;s Parking Lot Plant Sale, she was that all-knowing.  So then I paid his dues, in addition to the plants, got my membership discount, and as I balanced two of the three flats in my arms, her cohort bellered, &#8220;CARRY OUT!!!!&#8221; and I wanted to perhaps have some peace and quiet and a little less attention at that point. And in my haste to pull myself away from the OPPP (Old People Piling Plants), I jumped in my car and started to drive away. Whoops! I needed to also go to Gomer&#8217;s, and there&#8217;s just something slightly naughty about buying liquor at 9:15 in the morning, I think. For some unfortunate souls, I suppose it&#8217;s a ritual, but I had my heart set on getting some of that Patron Coffee Tequila (it&#8217;s not just for breakfast anymore), and then I picked up a birthday gift and had a very nice chat with the fellow working behind the counter. He upsold me to also buy a small bottle of Patron Orange Liqueur, in case I want to make top-shelf margaritas, and I think I just have a weakness for the bottle design. Oh, and I found the bottle of tequila that we sampled at that dinner and really liked, and it&#8217;s $52 a bottle. So. That stayed at Gomer&#8217;s.  <\/p>\n<p>But in the end? I spent more money on plants than I did on booze! Maybe I should try to find me one of those agave plants and combine the hobbies&#8230;..<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I started out my morning by, well, getting up. That&#8217;s always a good way to start, as opposed to waking up dead, or say, just falling out of bed and crawling around on the floor. AFTER that part, I went to Sutherlands, because they had annuals for $0.69 a four-pack. And hostas in 1# pots [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_mi_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[16,19],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1048"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1048"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1048\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1048"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1048"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1048"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}