{"id":1192,"date":"2007-11-17T13:56:00","date_gmt":"2007-11-17T18:56:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lawrencem94.sg-host.com\/?p=1192"},"modified":"2007-11-17T13:56:00","modified_gmt":"2007-11-17T18:56:00","slug":"the-aliens-have-landed-and-our-house-is-their-base-camp","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/?p=1192","title":{"rendered":"The Aliens Have Landed&#8230; and Our House Is Their Base Camp!"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Last night was something of a humdinger.  At one point, I actually wondered if one of those Electro-Magnetic-Pulse-thingies had gone off in the vicinity. (You know, Jack Bauer had to deal with one of those once, and how crazy is it that I actually thought of him amidst the chaos that was Last Night&#8217;s Electronics Disaster?!)<\/p>\n<p>So, I got home, and JWo and I had some de-lish takeout Vietnamese, and we watched Weeds. I noticed that the DVR (yes, THAT DVR, the DVR of Discontent) showed a bright red &#8220;RECORD&#8221; and yet when I hit the controls, it showed that it was recording &#8230; nothing. And it was whirring a bit. It&#8217;s been whirring lately, and I just let it. Whir, little friend. If you explode, we will blame Corporate Time Warner, because well, I already do.  I&#8217;ve saved you so much on therapy bills!  Anyway, James said it had been doing that since he got home, and since the recording log said it was now 100% full, I wisely panicked, because that could only mean one thing was coming: automatic deletion of shows for no reason. So I did what I&#8217;d been told last week, unplugged &#038; re-plugged, and let it re-boot. It seemed to do the trick! I felt quite satisfied.<\/p>\n<p>Later, I was watching tv &#038; checking email on James&#8217; laptop, and playing a little &#8220;Poppit&#8221;, when suddenly his computer froze. Not just the game, the whole kit &#038; caboodle. I turned it off, and rebooted, and began what has become a very tiresome long dance with the devil, because it will. not. reboot. Not in safe mode, not from the recovery CD, it freezes at a certain line of code when you reboot in safe mode with command prompts, I have updated the BIOS, (yes, my network administrator slip is showing), and I have searched the internets for solutions, and so far have been unsuccessful. We have a dead computer, unless I figure out what the magical resuscitation clue is. (It won&#8217;t even power on if it&#8217;s not plugged in.) So as I was wrangling with that, my cell phone rings.<\/p>\n<p>It&#8217;s James. Who is wondering what is going on, and I am thinking, holy moses, does he have a nanny cam on me? No, he&#8217;d just been trying to call the house phone, which would ring and ring and ring and ring and ring, with no answering machine. Or, I should point out, any RINGING on my end. Sure enough, the phone is dead. <br \/>WELL! We&#8217;ve been here before! I know what to do! So I begin. Racing around, upstairs, downstairs, jump up jump up and git down, unplugging power sources and phone cords. But. The corded phones don&#8217;t work, either. Hrm. I go to the basement and unplug and plug in the alarm, to make sure it&#8217;s not messing with the lines. I test the alarm system, twice. It works, but it also starts beeping at me. Because the landline phone lines aren&#8217;t working. (We have layers on the alarm system. I swear, try what you like, asshats, but that alarm is going OFF. With outdoor siren.) So, I call the phone company and immediately explain I have already attempted their foolproof plug-unplug-replug system, and so out to the box we go, in our jammies, at 11 pm, mind you, with a corded phone, a screwdriver, and my cell phone. Nope. None of the lines work. <\/p>\n<p>As the very cordial CSR is setting up the technician call, he sort of explains how surprised he was that I went outside this late to test the line. (Hi. I don&#8217;t put &#8220;Tenacious Jen&#8221; on my bills, but obviously we&#8217;ve never met.) I then tell him that we&#8217;ve had a whole host of electronics problems this evening, and while I&#8217;m not at the point I&#8217;m going to start wearing a colander for a hat to keep the aliens out, I AM going just a little bit crazy with it all.<\/p>\n<p>He laughed, I laughed, but I think we both knew I wasn&#8217;t lying. About the crazy part.<br \/>The colander hat is another matter entirely.<\/p>\n<p>(Oh, update, the phone issue has been identified &#8211; there&#8217;s some work being done down the street &#038; a crew &#8220;Stretched The Cable&#8221; causing a &#8220;Loss of Dial Tone&#8221;. I love the doublespeak for &#8220;We Fucked Up and Cut The Cable&#8221; resulting in &#8220;You Had No Phone.&#8221; But it&#8217;s fixed now!)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Last night was something of a humdinger. At one point, I actually wondered if one of those Electro-Magnetic-Pulse-thingies had gone off in the vicinity. (You know, Jack Bauer had to deal with one of those once, and how crazy is it that I actually thought of him amidst the chaos that was Last Night&#8217;s Electronics [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_mi_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[23],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1192"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1192"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1192\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1192"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1192"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1192"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}