{"id":17,"date":"2004-08-14T01:32:00","date_gmt":"2004-08-14T06:32:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lawrencem94.sg-host.com\/?p=17"},"modified":"2004-08-14T01:32:00","modified_gmt":"2004-08-14T06:32:00","slug":"oh-martha-fridays-are-a-good-thing","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/?p=17","title":{"rendered":"OH Martha, Fridays are a Good Thing."},"content":{"rendered":"

I ended my week informing James that everyone is out to get me, him included. The first half of the week was him gittin’ me, then people at work lined up. Conspiracies abound. I know that muther F’er in that white van that nearly ran over Kristin was really coming for me. All signs point to a need for serious hibernation from society, living in a yurt, and taking baths in hot springs with mud.<\/span>
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Oh, wait, I can’t, we have James’ family reunion tomorrow! Yippee!<\/em><\/strong> (these things are always hard, I never remember anyone, because we only go every other year it seems, and I don’t have any history with them.) I am taking the remaining pickles I made (thanks Martha, the zucchini pickles were a HIT.) Then it’s celebrate James’ birthday on sunday, complete with a trip to the dog track (that’s new to me), PF Chang’s (ok, I’ll stay in society through Sunday) and cake & ice cream & Six Feet Under. Somewhere in there I have to finish furry mittens for felting (if only my name were Fiona!) , do a TON of work I brought home (oh lord, I just can’t wait! death, take me now! wait! lettuce wraps & Costco cake await! I’ll do the work), and then the 800 other home things I never do: laundry, vacuuming, gardening, petkeeping (martha! send that dude over to wash my beasts), and have I mentioned the entire storage unit we’ve unloaded in the garage that IS ALL MINE? That remains to be sorted through, and where is that Mary Poppins wench when you need her? Spoonful of sugar won’t make this chore list go down, more like half a bottle of Bombay Sapphire. <\/span>
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The good news is, the mitten’s going FAST. <\/span>
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The bad news is, the Chiefs defense SUCK’T in their pre-season game. They must have many conspiracy people working against them.<\/span> Too.
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The good news is, my Auntie Karen did not get hit by the hurricane & they are safe.<\/span>
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There are many good things, I know this. I just get tired, and this was a week of Extraordinary Picking Upon My Nerves Like a Banjo, and I do not need another cross-eyed inbred young man on a bridge plucking out the rythym of my life next week. <\/span>
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We watched part one of Kill Bill tonight, and only Uma can make a canary-yellow track suit look good. I think if I got me some Okinawa steel, people at work might quit messin’ with me. Maybe they’d start calling me “The Czarina” (like “The Bride”), too, and then maybe I’d grow to be 6′ tall and have willowy limbs & really long toes, just like Uma. But then I’d have to deal with Quentin’s obsession, and as much as I love his movies, I do not need someone like that obsessed with me on top of everything else. Plus I’d probably be too tall to comfortably drive the Civic.<\/span>
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Hey, it’s Friday the 13th. No wonder this week blew.<\/span> <\/span>
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Can I just say the DQ commercials are flippin’ hilarious? It only took ten+ years since I worked on that damn account, and they didn’t even have to use a monkey.<\/span>
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<\/span>
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Julia Child, we will miss you. What a life lived, though. Bravo.<\/span><\/em>
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I ended my week informing James that everyone is out to get me, him included. The first half of the week was him gittin’ me, then people at work lined up. Conspiracies abound. I know that muther F’er in that white van that nearly ran over Kristin was really coming for me. All signs point […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_mi_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=17"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=17"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=17"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=17"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}