{"id":182,"date":"2005-01-23T13:37:00","date_gmt":"2005-01-23T18:37:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lawrencem94.sg-host.com\/?p=182"},"modified":"2005-01-23T13:37:00","modified_gmt":"2005-01-23T18:37:00","slug":"breakfast-of-champions","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/?p=182","title":{"rendered":"Breakfast of Champions"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Champion eaters, that is.<\/p>\n<p>I met Roger &#038; David for breakfast today, &amp; of course was ten minutes late. Driving there, I realized I&#8217;d forgotten to charge my phone last night &#8211; so it was one tiny bar o&#8217; charge &#038; my car charger wasn&#8217;t working &#8211; and then the gas light came on. &#8220;Who&#8217;s idea was this to meet at 9 a.m.?&#8221; I thundered, mentally. Well, that would be mine. Nobody should ever listen to me when I say we should meet anywhere, at anytime, before 10 a.m. on the weekends. It&#8217;s folly fueled by idealistic dreams and everyone should have learned that by now, myself included. (NOTE: Unless it is December 26, or the day after Thanksgiving. Then, I am on a mission and there is no such thing as too early.)<\/p>\n<p>The Cute Gay Boy waiter who&#8217;s worked at The Corner restaurant for years saw me and sang, &#8220;There she is!&#8221; and I felt like the princess that I am.  Roger, surprised, said, &#8220;How often do you come here?!&#8221; I said, &#8220;Not that often.&#8221; David observed it was probably my Evil Lime Green boa that made him feel at home. CGB hooked me up with coffee &#038; we waited for our assigned waiter.<br \/>\n<br \/>I always assume half the waitstaff has rolled out of bed hungover, and our waiter was actually still wearing his coat, a coat I recall seeing on classmates back in  sixth grade. It&#8217;s good to see styles recur.<\/p>\n<p>So we ordered. Roger: &#8220;Two banana-pecan cakes, a side of potatoes.&#8221; (Me: &#8220;The Atkins platter?&#8221;) David got a scrambled egg platter. Me: &#8220;Two corn cakes,&#8221; (Roger: &#8220;OOOO! What are corncakes?!&#8221;) and a potatoful with spinach, tomatoes, onions and cheddar. Oh and bacon. What the hell.&#8221; Roger: &#8220;Oh yeah, and a half order of biscuits &#038; gravy.&#8221; (to me: &#8220;You&#8217;ll eat some, right?&#8221; me: &#8220;Oh sure.&#8221; See, it&#8217;s just so easy to do, because everything&#8217;s $2-$3 per &#8220;side&#8221;, and it&#8217;s like Breakfast Tapas, plates and plates and plates to sample. But I tell ya, if you get their filled pancakes, like the banana pecan? They&#8217;re GINORMOUS and you can&#8217;t really have three other sides, unless you shove them in your pockets &amp; reheat later. So that&#8217;s why I went with the corncakes, thinking they&#8217;d be smaller. It didn&#8217;t matter. Everything&#8217;s big, not small, like Tapas and we embarked on our Greco-Roman Buffet O&#8217; Breakfast.)<\/p>\n<p>Our waiter was writing everything down and explaining to Roger (I&#8217;m a little fuzzy on the exact wording) that corncakes were like kettle corn, you know, popcorn but sweeter.  Feeling a little self-conscious about everything we&#8217;d willy-nilly ordered, I said, &#8220;We haven&#8217;t eaten in a week. We chain ourselves to the radiator &#038; we get to come out on Sundays.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Confirming the &#8220;just rolled in hungover&#8221; theory, our waiter simply nodded at me.  Like he&#8217;d heard it before, many times.  Ah, the old &#8220;chained to the radiator&#8221; diet.  Well, it was a hell of a breakfast &#038; we ate like marathon athletes, training for a &#8211; well, a buffet.<\/p>\n<p><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Champion eaters, that is. I met Roger &#038; David for breakfast today, &amp; of course was ten minutes late. Driving there, I realized I&#8217;d forgotten to charge my phone last night &#8211; so it was one tiny bar o&#8217; charge &#038; my car charger wasn&#8217;t working &#8211; and then the gas light came on. &#8220;Who&#8217;s [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_mi_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/182"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=182"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/182\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=182"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=182"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=182"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}