{"id":631,"date":"2005-12-14T07:53:00","date_gmt":"2005-12-14T12:53:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lawrencem94.sg-host.com\/?p=631"},"modified":"2005-12-14T07:53:00","modified_gmt":"2005-12-14T12:53:00","slug":"short-term-boob-storage","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/?p=631","title":{"rendered":"Short-Term Boob Storage"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Well, seems like we started something with that post yesterday; phsymom asked in the comments if we knew people who stored OTHER stuff in their bras, beyond the errant bread crumb or salad shrimp.<\/p>\n<p>I worked for a woman in Minneapolis who kept her cash tucked in her bra. She was interesting, her name was Pat, she was brusque, and she had a bob haircut &#038;  slavic features. Pat + Bob + Brusque = Manly!  But she never wore pants, always dresses &#038; suits. Anyway, she was a shorter version of Janet Reno without the glasses, and dressed as conservatively as ol&#8217; Janet did. She had a suit-type dress in several bland colors that she just rotated, so it became a uniform of sorts. One of my co-workers enjoyed calling her Pat-iooooo furniture behind her back. Why, I&#8217;m not sure, but it was funny. My line for her was, &#8220;What&#8217;s got into that PAT?&#8221; I digress. Back to Bra Storage 101: it was always disconcerting when you&#8217;d go in her office, suggest we get bagels for the team meeting, and she&#8217;d agree, reach into her dress &#038; whip a $20 out of her bra &#038; hand it to you. There&#8217;s a reason it&#8217;s lovingly referred to as cold hard cash. Warm bills throw you off your game. You&#8217;d take the money, gingerly &#038; hesitantly, and tell yourself you&#8217;d never become her. <\/p>\n<p>Then, you do. It starts randomly &#038; innocently&#8230; Every place I&#8217;ve worked seems to put the vending machines in close proximity to the bathrooms. Therefore, when you take a little bathroom break &#038; decide to be efficient with your time &#8211; you bring a little cash along with you to get a soda or a candy bar. I can&#8217;t stand to set anything down in a restroom, so where do you put your dollar bill if you have no pockets? You tuck it into your bra strap and think, &#8220;I&#8217;ve become Pat.&#8221; Of course, I&#8217;m far more stylish and would never hand warm money to co-workers, but necessity is the mother of invention, and bras can provide short-term storage options (for things beyond your boobs)&#8230;. The bigger the bra, the bigger the real estate &#8211; and storage!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Well, seems like we started something with that post yesterday; phsymom asked in the comments if we knew people who stored OTHER stuff in their bras, beyond the errant bread crumb or salad shrimp. I worked for a woman in Minneapolis who kept her cash tucked in her bra. She was interesting, her name was [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_mi_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/631"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=631"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/631\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=631"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=631"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/plazajen.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=631"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}