Riding the Bike with One Pedal.

Category: kansas city (Page 5 of 10)

Nothing Like A Little Gunplay Before Bed…

Did you hear about this story? Well, I was at least glad to get more details this morning, as I went to bed scared shitless because of the activity surrounding it in our neighborhood.  I was getting ready to turn everything off and go to bed, and I heard some strange noises outside. The dogs heard them, too, but didn’t get too alarmed (and they bark at almost everything), so I didn’t think much of it. Then, a cop car with lights & sirens on flew down our street. Like, at least 60 mph. (I thought, huh, he’s going to realize he went BY Crazy Cat Lady’s house any second…. since that’s where they normally stop.) Nope. I’m turning off lights, and BLAM, there goes another cop car, in the other direction, no sirens or lights, then two MORE cars go by, with just lights. And the sound of a helicopter grows closer.

Now I’m a little skittish. As are the dogs. They are burfing and running from lookout point to lookout point. I am locking and checking everything and turning off lights as fast as possible. (If someone’s in our back yard, I don’t want to be lit up like a shiny pink target through the windows.) Our house is right by an elementary school, and in the parking lot, I see a huge convergence of  cop car lights at all sorts of crazy angles, lit from overhead by the copter. THEN they all peel off and are driving back down our street! They turn on the corner, another cop car meets them (this is all now just one backyard and across the street from our house), the copter is circling, and I hear POWPOWPOWPOWPOW like, fifteen times, and while they sort of sound like firecrackers, in my mind, there could only be one explanation: gun fire. And THEN, the copter keeps circling and the cars start backing up to leave like they didn’t get the person (though it would seem they did, now that I read the news bite)  and after the hubbub seemed to be moving away, I finally let the dogs out for one quick potty break, and put myself into bed, where my sleeping husband continued to doze, missing all the excitement. (I did try to see if he would stir and wake up after the gunplay, but he had taken a Tylenol PM and was out for the night.) Had it turned into a Shotgun Needed! sort of night, I would have tried harder, of course. I was just terrified we had bandito(s) in the greenhouse, hiding.

This morning, I reflected on the fact that was quite the run in the nighttime cold weather, from Popeye’s to our neighborhood. It’s not that far distance-wise, but there’s a pretty big hill, slick spots everywhere and I just can’t comprehend how all of that could have been close to worth it – what could the till be at Popeye’s? $100? Now the dude’s in a hospital bed, in critical condition. Another drain on the system, for who knows how long.  It blows my mind that we are neglecting students’ education, not putting the money into education properly, instead emphasizing test scores over actual learning, yet we’ll pay so much more in the long run with the less-desirable public services – prison, policing and officers involved in shootings, court system, hospital bills.  Our priorities as a nation are fucked up.  I don’t understand how we can be so logically challenged. I realize that even with massive overhauls, there will always be criminals, but I’m watching my husband slog through a classroom of kids who could care less about performing on state-mandated tests –  yet they know how to do the work, and get it when he uses an analogy of their apathy to them. It’s somewhat ironic: If you went to Popeye’s and ordered a bucket of chicken, ten pieces, but they put 6 raw ones in and gave you only 4 cooked pieces, you’d be mad, right? You didn’t order raw chicken! Well, that’s what you’re giving me – only 40% of your ability, when I know you can do 100%. They all nod. Yes, they’d be mad. Nobody eats raw chicken.

But they just don’t care. Get a gun. Rob the joint. It’s somehow, technically, easier. Again, logic is defied. I can only shake my head.

OH the other snow thing I forgot to mention.

We have GOT to get some parking guidelines established. That was another thing we had in Minneapolis – snow emergency got declared, and you were hustling to make sure your car was parked on the correct side of the street, because that’s how they got stuff plowed properly.  You can see how this works on their website. And I can hear the whining already. WAAAAH I don’t know what day of the Emergency we’re on WAAAAAH which day is odd?!WAAAAHHHH well, call the waaaahmbulance (you can probably meet Crazy Cat Lady, she’ll share a ride) because it works. And yeah, if you ignore it, you get a ticket & can even get towed. But the streets are driveable. And that makes it worth it!

Still Not Street-Happy

I emailed both my city council members and fired off a request for SAND to the city’s 3-1-1 Action Center via the internet yesterday. This is what I got in return:

The City’s Snow and Ice Plan calls for keeping primary and arterial streets open for traffic. On primary and arterial streets, crews plow curb-to-curb and work around the clock to remove snow and apply salt. On residential streets, the plan calls for providing a passable lane. In addition to plowing, crews assigned to residential streets apply salt on intersections, hills and slick areas. We will take your information and it will be placed in the data base.

Thank you for contacting the 3-1-1 Action Center

Uh, ok. I live on a residential street, and let’s talk about how un-passable this “lane” is. When I left this morning, I had the misfortune to end up behind the recycling dump truck, and so I slowed, stopped, waiting, only to see this enormous vehicle completely stuck at the top of a small incline. So I started to back up, the recycling truck began backing up, and we did this fun-packed dance for at least a block. I almost ended up in the ditch, because I was trying to avoid a car parked on the road, and backing up in snowing weather on snowy streets that haven’t been plowed makes it a little tough to stay in the two snow-packed ruts when you have objects to avoid and forty-ton truck in reverse coming at you and it can’t gain traction.

A plow is useless at this point, because this shit is frozen solid in the form of an ice pack on top of the concrete. I seriously doubt the plows will go up and down sixteen times to get down to the pavement. So I asked for sand. I don’t need ice melt, just SAND. Our house is at the top of a small hill, and all day yesterday, I heard the whining and spinning and grinding of motors and tires trying to make it up the incline. I get it, it was a big snowstorm, it happened over a holiday, but this is simply inexcusable at this point. It’s been a week. The primary roads near us (Wornall, State Line, Homes) are clear. I don’t know wtf defines a street as arterial, maybe it’s the bigger streets with lights on them? All I know is that it’s a giant mess, and the people delivering packages and mail and just trying to get in and out of their homes are all at risk until this city bites the bullet and gets on the ball here. I’ve never, ever had to wait this long to have our street plowed, and if I could withhold my city taxes in protest, I sure as hell would. Until everything melts or the streets get cleared, whichever comes first.


Straight From The Horse’s Mouth:

I give you the direct quote from the FedEx man who just came by: “You folks are NOT getting a fair shake with these roads.”
He left, shaking his head with disgust.
I hear ya, buddy. The absence of any plow on our street has caused the whole thing to become snow-packed. Which in turn becomes solid chunks of ice. Way to go with the snow removal, Kansas City. Would it be too much to ask for a little sand, at least?

Ripple-rriffic!

Ripple Glass Recycling

I was so happy to learn that a Ripple Glass recycling container was going in near us – this one’s in the Gomer’s parking lot, 99th & Holmes. When I was in Gomer’s a couple weeks ago, one of the employees told me it had been there a short time and was already half full! I’ve got a container now in the garage for collecting our own glass, and am most impressed by the consortium of businesses that came together to make it happen – as someone who’s acutely aware of marketing and how it’s amassed, created and presented, I give this one two thumbs up. The corporate sponsors have their logos on the container, and it’s a brilliant initiative spearheaded by Boulevard Brewing.  Check out the site & start recycling!

The More Things Change…

…the more they stay the same.

On Friday, James was home & out front, cleaning out the gutters. You know, normal work for mid-November. (What is UP with the blowing hot & cold?!)  He suddenly darted in, whispering, “The Pee-er! She’s Back!”

Sure enough, we could see her blue-green coat through the now-leafless branches, rise as she stood up, and exited the neighbor’s yard, adjusting her kerchief and resuming her morning walk. Kinda strange, but there is a fire hydrant right there. I suppose she’s developed a…habit.

Then, tonight, I was driving home after some afternoon knitting with friends, and the road rises and falls as it approaches our house. I thought I saw a little red twinkle, and wondered if someone on the block had perhaps taken advantage of the nice weather and put their holiday lights up a bit early. Oh, silly me. One more small hill and it was abundantly clear that the lights were coming from emergency vehicles, blocking the street in front of Crazy Cat Lady’s house. A fire truck, a police cruiser, a paddy wagon and an ambulance. Light show spectacular. So here’s a snapshot of the crazy:

Just Another Saturday Night

Just another weekend in our mix of a neighborhood!

Random Orts

1. My hand is on fire from thinking I would be impervious to jalapenos. I simply was holding them, as I cored and de-seeded over 100 of them. Later, I filled them with cream cheese. Next up, drenching them four times, freezing them & then storing them for spicy treats this winter! And a note to self to get some smaller gloves, because that was my other excuse – the ones we have are terribly floppy and not fun to wear for two hours. But then having your hand En Flambe for 10 hours is probably less desirable. Lesson! Learned!

2. Whoever writes for Grey’s Anatomy is well-aware of grief and how it ‘works’. I’d saved up this season to watch and the season premiere was like hitting yourself repeatedly with a tire iron. But it’s nice to be able to smile and nod and just get it, when I’m done crying. The oddest triggers still surprise me…. flipping on the radio to hear Bob Dylan and sobbing for fifteen minutes, deep abandoned sobs, as though it were new and fresh and brutal all over again.

3. Interviewing is reminding me of dating. Except it’s not really acceptable to drink during them.

4. The dogs are scrapping with each other sporadically as they adjust to life without Suzy. James and I just hit little jagged edges of grief, like catching your t-shirt on a nail, stopping you short. We miss her. I think the most charming thing she did, and it usually happened close to dinner time, or when she’d been alone for a while, was if you pointed at her with both index fingers, and said endearingly, “Who is the Suzy?!” over and over, she would curl her lips up and smile at you. The week she died, I tried to say it to her and I ended up bawling my head off, and then lying down on the floor with her and holding her. That’s what I did in the vet’s office, too. You know, there are points in your life, when you reach an age, and you endure things, that you just don’t give a good goddamn about how you look or what other people think. So in all my largesse, I laid on that cold tile floor with her, and then I walked out, carrying her collar and leash, doing the Ugly Cry as a waiting room full of people looked at me with some degree of fear in their eyes. The other sweet thing she did when we first moved in to the house was BedCheck at night. The Chessie in her gave her the instinct to guard, and she would patrol around the house after the lights were out, just to make sure everything was in order. She was the Suzy.

5. There have been positives that have come from my unemployment. Realizing and recognizing the enormous network of people out there that I have. Re-connecting with some awesome people, some of whom are in the same boat. Meeting new people, too. I’ve gotten a couple new friends and it just makes me marvel, that something that felt so wrenching could have so many positive off-shoots. Now the challenge is to find a new path and new environment that’s healthy and balanced. It’s fun to think about.

6. Brussels Sprouts. I am so excited for them to be in season. Roasted, with bacon & drizzled with balsamic vinegar? Heaven on earth!

7. Sunshine. Blessed, blessed sunshine. It was so dark and gloomy for so many days, I was having flashbacks to February in Minneapolis. It got so bad one year, a local company took a bunch of employees up in an airplane above the clouds, just to give everyone a dose of light. I hope it sticks around – I love a good rainy day or two, but I also love Fall sunshine….

8. Typos. I work my butt off to avoid them, but sometimes, even with the best of intentions and proofing, they just happen. And since our knitting guild is moving around right now (the current location is up for sale), we’re meeting at a couple different libraries this month and next. In an effort to be helpful, I updated the monthly reminder that goes out a day early, with the revised locations. Only, instead of “SHAWNEE library”, I missed the “S”. Which meant I sent out a notice for everyone to meet-up at the HAWNEE library. I’ll just have to channel my inner Austin Powers for tomorrow night’s meeting….yeah baby.

Oh, It’s A Mix, Alright.

I just went to the front door to put a Netflix movie and a thank-you note in the mail, and I saw, across the street, a figure standing back from the road, moving behind some shrubbery. Before I opened the door, I waited and watched. A spry senior citizen, in her magenta jacket, emerged. She adjusted the kerchief on her head, and as she walked back out to the road, finished tucking her shirt in her jeans. Striding off down the road, she continued on her walk.

Morning Constitution, indeed.

Blight in Da Hood

I love the Kansas City Action Line. I used to think there were just three black women, truly running the city. Now I know there’s also a dude.

There is a house in our neighborhood (not Crazy Cat Lady’s) that is an abomination. They cut down a tree this spring – ok, no problem – but left the wood all in a jumble. Ok, I don’t get my knickers in a twist over a woodpile. But they put all their brush in the ditch, where apparently it was an offering to the Great Beaver Gods, intended to be dragged away by magical beavers building a mythical dam in Indian Creek, over a mile away.  That’s my spin on it, anyway. I know in my heart of hearts they’re just drunk, stupid & lazy.

So you’d think… ok. Lotsa brush, lotsa wood. Is it really worth throwing said neighborhood folks under the bus? Well, as I put it tonight on the phone to the very nice man at the Action Line, the rest of the yard is… (I struggled to not use profanity, while searching for appropriate words…) the rest of the yard is Sanford & Sons. He started to laugh. Buoyed by his response, I continued, ” Like, I hear, ‘Ba ba BA DA, BA BA DA DA DA DA DA ba ba ba’ whenever I drive by,” as I entertained him my interpretation of the saxophone into to said sitcom.

He could not speak for a few seconds, because he was laughing so hard, and then he apologized for losing his composure (don’t be silly! You’re all-powerful, you deserve to laugh!)

Turns out there have been two other calls before me, and they were cited 14 days ago. Which means they’re due for a re-inspection almost immediately, and with that can come court summons and a fine! Zoiks! I’m pretty sure one of the folks who lives closer to the house lost their patience sooner.

I love the action line. It should never, ever go away. Just like this tune. You know you wanna hear it again:

It’s The Great Pumpkin Conspiracy, That’s What.

I clipped an article out of the Star a week or so ago, for a Gooey Butter Cake recipe that uses pumpkin, ala Paula Deen. Seriously, anything Paula Deen does has to be good because it’s gonna involve a half-ton of sugar, at least a stick of butter, and usually the advice to top it all off with a big ol’ spoonful of whipped cream. So no big challenge there, all the ingredients are very normal, ordinary things.

Being unemployed means I get to go to the grocery store when all the old people are shopping. It’s rather nice. I went to Price Chopper on Monday, and in the baking aisle, where all the canned pumpkin should be? Nada. Zip. Zilch. Nothing. Like there’d been a giant recall or a giant rush on the canned pumpkin. OK, I still had some time before I needed to make this. So today, after hanging & commiserating with Pensive Girl, I went to Aldi’s. (Aldi’s! Yes! My first time ever! Being frugal can really be an adventure. More on that later. I will say I researched it online so I wouldn’t look too new or stupid.) No pumpkin. They did have cranberry sauce, though. Ok. So, no biggie, Aldi’s doesn’t have everything, I’ll just swing into the ghetto Price Chopper on my way home.  (Sing it in your Cartman voice, “In the gheetttooooo”…) SAME THING. Completely empty shelf. What?! The?! Fuck!? Is everyone in the mood for pie, suddenly?

I decide, ok, Ward Parkway Target. I know, it’s not a full-service grocery store, but they’ve expanded…. maybe they’ll have it. Nope. They did have some evaporated milk with a photo of a SLICE of pumpkin pie on it, which fooled me for two seconds, and then I was angry at the can label for having suckered me in. Turns out the gorgeous Rashan, who tried to help me, and also had a canned pumpkin need (he was making cheesecake), had fallen for the same duplicitous photo on the milk can. And he also determined that no, there was no pumpkin to be had. They’ll have it later, as a seasonal item.

So I don’t know what the dealy-bob is with the run on canned pumpkin in the regular grocery store – I can’t imagine that many people raced to the store after seeing that recipe – but I may have to try Hy-Vee or -eek- WalMart if we’re going to have this cake before November. Because I am not going to buy a pumpkin and cook it, just to be able to make a recipe that involves using a box cake mix. If you see canned pumpkin out there, lemme know!

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