Can you believe I gave myself a SECOND papercut within hours yesterday? And this one was not an ordinary paper cut, or even the next level-up, the manila folder paper cut. This was the shove-your-hand-in-your-purse-and-get-a-paper-cut-UNDER-YOUR-THUMB-from-your-checkbook maneuver.
That one? That one I’m hoping never happens again, ever. I will take the regular paper cuts in stride, but that one really sent me into a tizzy.
Day: January 12, 2005
World Market (CostPlus to those of you out West) sells Haribo Gummi Bears by the 3# bag! I am in heaven. Haribo bears are the only ones (I’m aware of) that come pre-toughened. I love the chew factor. If I get reincarnated as a dog, I hope I get an owner who believes in pig ears & rawhides.
I am about to crank out a major buy, so I’m jammin to Janet J’s Velvet Rope, and got my portion of gummies sorted by color/flavor. It’s important to be prepared.
And happy.
Ah, joyful dog ownership.
I came downstairs last night planning on heading to bed – actually sort of early for me, 9:50 p.m.! As I hit the last stair I smelled an AWFUL stench. So bad I actually looked on the floor for dog poop.
OH NO. “What happened?”
“Your dog.”
“Huh?”
“I let them out & she ran out front & ate cat crap.”
“Wow. It’s AWFUL.”
Scrambling ensued, as we tried to find the giant CostCo can o’ Lysol. Polly was banished to the living room & James paraded through the house, spraying disinfectant.
“I can’t believe it smells this much!” I said, tossing Polly two “Yip Yap” dog breath fresheners.
“This is an emergency!” James declared, still pressing down the nozzle & eradicating germs everywhere.
So he trundled off to bed & I decided to hang out & wait for the smell to die down. I finished the “Grim Grotto”, by Lemony Snickett, and around 10:30, called Polly to go to bed. As I headed into our bedroom in the dark, the stench hit me again, like a 2×4 cracking me across the nose. “Sheesh!” I thought, and leaned down to find her collar to “click” her in (we prevent night wanderings by keeping her on a leash, tied to the window.) My hands found stiff, icky fur.
OH hell. She didn’t eat cat poop, she found a new dog poop cologne, and bathed in it.
Back to the bathroom. The smell was gageriffic. 30 minutes later she was clean, towel-dried, and I was ready for bed with a vengeance.
The joys of dog mommyhood. Just as poop-filled as regular people parents.